Scrolling comments on a YouTube video, I read this:
“Just a reminder that only Jesus can decide who goes to hell. As beautiful as your soul is, I feel as though we can understand that those who suffer in sin are who Jesus died on the cross for. We are all sinners and in pursuit of Jesus Christ, we gain conviction from the Holy Spirit.”
For context, the video was about what Scripture defines as sin, and what it tells us about how to live in the world, but not of it. The comment struck me, because I think many people fall under this same assumption – that to call sin what it is, is the same as “to judge.”
That is a misunderstanding.
To say “don’t judge” sounds humble. It sounds gracious. But underneath it is a confusion that quietly does harm to the very people it wants to protect.
Speaking of truth is not, in and of itself, judgment. Those two things are not the same.
In direct response to that idea, and that comment, I would say this:
Jesus has already decided, and He has laid it out very clearly in the Scriptures.
Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (1 Corinthians 6:9-11)
Notice what that passage does. It doesn’t end with condemnation. It ends with a door. And such were some of you. Past tense. That is the gospel.
Love doesn’t hide or redefine these truths. Love seeks to guide those living in sin toward repentance and true deliverance, just as Christ welcomed and delivered me when I, like the young woman speaking in the video, returned to Him after running away, after saying to Him, even when I understood what was at stake, “I’m not ready yet, I’m not sure, but wait for me.”
What was really happening at that time in my life was me continuing to choose myself. I wasn’t asking Him to wait for me even for my own sake. I was, arrogantly and selfishly, saying, “I get it, you know I was saved as a child, but I don’t want to change my lifestyle or give up worldly pleasures right now, so when I’m ready I’ll come back.”
The commenter mentioned conviction, and yes — I was convicted. But the Holy Spirit opening a door, pulling back the curtain and showing you the truth, is not the same as convicting you. I was not convicted before the Holy Spirit worked through those who loved me and helped me to pay attention and grasp the understanding of the difference between my own voice and the Holy Spirit’s.
It is also important to note that people who have accepted Christ earlier in their life and backslidden, or make a conscious choice to turn their back on Him, as I had, will have experiences like that. Those who have never been saved in the first place? They won’t hear the Holy Spirit, because the Holy Spirit is a gift you receive only after you have received Christ’s gift of salvation.
The theology I hold to be true — because I have lived it — is this: Salvation is the gift of grace, through faith. You have to believe, to receive. Many have not yet believed, so the conviction of the Holy Spirit will not fall on them without hearing the truth of the gospel and Scripture through the voices of believers.
On the point of speaking the truth from love and what distinguishes that from judgment, consider the following verses:
Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment. (John 7:24)
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. (Proverbs 27:6)
There is a kind of love that tells you the hard thing, not to wound you, but because it cannot watch you walk toward a cliff and stay silent. That is the kind of love that is driven by the Holy Spirit and not self, and it is the kind of love that caused me to pay attention to the Holy Spirit and understand the difference between that first whisper and full on conviction.
The people who loved me enough to name my sin were not judging me. They were refusing to let me believe that my comfort mattered more than my soul. Even then, it required an active choice on my part to return to God, to choose to serve Christ over my own flesh, mind, and desires for my human life.
When I made that choice, and when I had surrendered not only my sin but my human will to His will (this is where the free will argument comes in — and often falls apart for those who use it as an excuse — which is another topic for another day) He not only accepted me, He welcomed me.
That is His grace. But I would not have sought it, or found that comprehension, or made that choice to return to Him, if those who loved me had excused my sin and called it accepting me or loving me.
They did love me, by not tolerating my sin and by guiding me home. To speak these realities is not to judge or marginalize anyone; it is to follow the law of God and the ministry of Christ.
Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ. (Ephesians 4:15)
True charity wills the eternal good of the other, not affirmation of what separates us from God.
If you are someone who has been called judgmental for speaking truth in love, take heart. You are in good company — with every prophet, every apostle, and with Christ Himself, who spoke plainly about sin precisely because He loved the people trapped in it.
And if you are the one still running, still saying “not yet” — I understand more than you know. What is waiting on the other side of that surrender is not condemnation. It is a door. And Someone standing at it, ready not just to accept you, but to welcome you home.
The kindest thing anyone can do for someone caught in sin is not to make them comfortable in it. It is to point them toward the One who can wash it clean.
Twin Tree Project 